Day 2: Let There Be Cheese

I've decided after yesterday's little discussion about cheese that I'm going to go on a cheese diet. Meaning eating strictly cheese. So, for breakfast, a little cheese on crackers, for lunch, the cheese grease fried grilled cheese sandwich, for dinner, just a block of cheese. A big block of blue, stinky cheese. Makes grocery shopping easy, which I desparately need help in. I have problems when the grocery list is longer than 5 items as I've usually lost the list the second I've written it. I eventually find them, like on the back of my college diploma. It's confusing and nothing is ever in the same aisle or within a mile radius of that aisle. Aisle 73 is a good aisle, lots of camping equipment. Take a nap, heat up some soup. I don't recommend a campfire, though. I've been told not to on a few occasions.

Oh yeah. So Day 2 of unemployment. It's Saturday, so I've decided that it is a good time to drink. I mean, I tend to drink everyday but everyday is not always a good time to drink. Like when your grocery shopping. You've got no chance in hell getting more than one item into your cart while blotto. Unfortunately, that one item is usually not cheese and it then becomes a complete waste of gas.

I've decided to start cooking again, too. My toaster chicken was quite popular and my fans have recommended that I wrap it in bacon. However, I have become somewhat of a toaster expert in the last few years and I know, I know that bacon will set the toaster on fire. So, sorry to everyone out there hoping for bacon wrapped toaster chicken, it won't be happening in my apartment. It would be safer to set up a meth lab.

So, really, I did nothing today. Get off my back. I only got fired 2 days ago.