May 1st means alot of things to alot of people but to me, it means Commie Day because I think that's cool. Not just because I have the Commie Mints from Chicken Scratch on Whyte still in my purse, but I like the colour red. I look really good in red lace. I mean it, I really do. And it gives me a bit of comfort to my little, tiny ego knowing that there is a day sanctioned for protest that entirely revolves around my red undershirts; Giving the people who live and die for capitalism a voice via my underwear. Blablabla. Okay, that's too much now.
Truthfully, I'm depressed and trying not to think of the fact that I got STOOD UP today (and the fact I've still not got a job). I spiraled a little. I guess I can put up with alot of things that men put me through, but I CANNOT forgive being stood-up. That's the deal breaker for me right there, your dead to me after that. Cancelling last minute, you get two of those before I back over you with a stolen tractor-trailer. Not bothering to call me that the plans are off, well, I really can't say what I'll do. And I'm an idiot for letting him do that to me. So I kind of blame myself, getting attached is not something that should ever happen anyway. I'm 35 and single, I know the rules. It's war out there, you've got to keep your defenses up, I'm telling you. Men are like stormtroopers, you can hit them all with one bullet at the right angle but stay focused, even a stormtrooper can get a shot in before hitting the ground. Something...something...something...dark side. bwahaha. I've got no life.
Just giving my head a shake now. Heading to Ontario for May 3, the only excitement in my life. I find out on May 5 if I get the latest "dream" job, too. But if I don't get it, well, I'm seriously thinking of a new angle here. And an extra long vacation it is, nobody really to think about except for myself so why the hell not? Not really my piece of cake being queen of singledom again (lost my status for about a month there, but I'll get it back, sluttiness is way more fun than suicide) but it will have to do because at this point in my life, I need a job that respects me and a guy who actually cares for me. Yeah, I know, a little much to ask, I totally agree. We all have our dreams.
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